The Globalization of G.I. Joe

September 7th, 2007 | by Sqotty |

Hollywood, and this time Paramount Pictures in particular, has veered far-left yet again. They are changing an all-American icon of heroism into a globalized entity for the sake of political correctness and “International appeal.” What are we talking about? G.I. Joe is being transformed from “Government Issue Joe” into “Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity.” Say what?

A lot of us as kids had G.I. Joe action figures. Who wants to play with a “Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity?” Entity? Good God, they aren’t even people, but entities?

From FoxNews:

Paramount has confirmed that in the movie, the name G.I. Joe will become an acronym for “Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity” – an international, coed task force charged with defeating bad guys. It will no longer stand for government issued, as in issued by the American government.

The studio won’t elaborate, saying filming hasn’t begun and details are still in the works, but the behind-the-scenes rumblings are that the producers have decided to change the nature of G.I. Joe in order to appeal to a wider, more international audience.

The word is that in the current political climate, they’re afraid that a heroic U.S. soldier won’t fly.

Okay, so we have some pack of numbnuts who would rather appeal to the International market rather than to the American people. As usual, Hollywood is clueless.

Here’s an idea. Instead of changing G.I. Joe from being the original American hero into some P.C. dehumanized and emasculated object, how about keeping him as is: male, heroic and American. Instead of making films like Redacted how about a film where we have a group of G.I. Joe’s teamed up with their Coalition equivalents (especially some guys like the El Salvadorans who made headlines a few years back) and Iraqi soldiers, all equally heroic and representing their nations, battling the evil terrorists and insurgents in Iraq, spreading freedom and democracy in their wake?

Let me guess, they don’t think it would appeal internationally. I suppose that it is too much to ask for from Hollywood to produce something that will appeal to Americans, especially those who have answered duties call by serving in the Armed Forces.

Retired Army Col. David W. Hunt, a FOX News military and terrorism analyst, called the scheme to make a whole new Joe “a shame.”

“G.I. Joe is a U.S. guy,” Hunt said. “What are we going to call it – Global Joe? International Joe? It’s kind of stupid. It’s ridiculous that they’re doing that.”

Paramount wouldn’t say whether an American would be part of the new “global entity,” nor would it offer specifics about the storyline or the characters.

So, has Paramount figured out what will be so appealing to Americans to see a film about a bunch of global entities?

Does Hollywood hate our military so much that they have to distance themselves from all of the important, and good, American military icons? do they believe that Americans would rather view a bunch of “Global Entities” rather than American Heroes? Do they even care? Or are they suffering a total disconnect?

From IGN:

Who needs A Real American Hero? Not Paramount or Hasbro it seems. The studio’s live-action feature film version of G.I. Joe will no longer revolve around a top-secret U.S. special forces team but rather an international operation.

In a follow-up to their confirmation that Stephen Sommers will direct G.I. Joe, Variety offers this new description of the team: “G.I. Joe is now a Brussels-based outfit that stands for Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, an international co-ed force of operatives who use hi-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer. The property is closer in tone to X-Men and James Bond than a war film.”

Wow. A Real Globally Integrated Hero! Can we assume that this “double-crossing Scottish arms dealer” is Destro since he was one in the comics? And does that mean there will be no Cobra Commander in it?

So why the changes? Hasbro and Paramount execs recently spoke about the challenges of marketing a film about the U.S. military at a time when the current U.S. administration and the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are at a low-point in global polls. When a studio makes a film as expensive as G.I. Joe will likely be, they want to know that as many people as possible around the world will want to see it. In other words, G.I. Joe — “A Real American Hero” — is a tough sell.

So they will instead come up with an X-Manish style film with International appeal as it will sell better in France, rather than depicting “A Real American Hero” winning battles and risking his life to save a fallen comrade.

Let the X-Men do X-Manish films and leave James Bond to Sean Connery, and put the hero back into G.I. Joe.

When G.I. Joe becomes G.I.J.O.E., it will no longer be anything I will want to see.

See also Conservablogs’ write-up on de-Americanizing of G.I.Joe.

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